he's my edward cullen
I am pretty sure Edward Cullen never had an all-day drinking binge topped off with some blow.
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
I was wondering how I got the burn marks on my boobs and then I remembered....
The baked potato bra?
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
Then it hit me - his penis wasn't a shiny new toy anymore and I wanted a new one.
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
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