Bro, I met the coolest hottest chick tonight and she has the hottest friends.
Where are you?
Strip Club
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
apparently the officer said last night, "son, why don't you do yourself a favor and spread your legs so you don't keep vomiting on them". why can't I remember those nights?!
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
While I faked being asleep, he literally prayed to God out loud, asking for forgiveness for losing his virginity before marriage.
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
To be fair, this is a tequila-while-rewatching-Benedict-Cumberbatch-as-Van-Gogh idea, so I don't know if it will hold up tomorrow.
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
Randomize
