We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
There is nothing scarier than watching yourself breathe in the mirror while on shrooms.
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
I most definitely just found a video on my phone that I accidentally took... You can't see anything and all you can hear is me talking about how good your water was... And then I fed it to you... And used the word "eloquent" to describe it.
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
all i tweeted was "emergency this is not a drill" and he immediately texted me asking if this was a subtle booty call…it was
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
Can you get the dildos out of the shower before the maids come?
Randomize
