just next time i won't let coke make me think I'm superman and drink a shit ton.
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
Yikes. I usually have a 24-hour waiting period between sex partners. You know, like for a handgun.
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
My friend asked me if I got home okay and I replied "Glad teat. Goodnight." Usually I can translate drunk me, but I'm even lost on that one.
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
Im just drunk enough to admit that I miss Hannah Montana.
Randomize
