you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
I need a $60 an hour job, because I have a $50 an hour drinking habit.
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
Don't talk about his dick. That's mine. There's a copyright on it. Use with permission
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
I can still taste the Jäger. I'm gonna shoot myself.
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
You are the jesus of drinking
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
Randomize
