he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
I am in the hospital with a broken wrist because a guy told me that if I punched him it "wouldn't hurt." it hurt. me. Thank you 11 jello shots.
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
Randomize
