On a scale from 0 to 24...wait, 3 to 24, where 6 is the lowest and 12 is the highest, how freaking high re you right now?
K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
I literally recorded a toilet flushing to make it his ringtone to remind me what a piece of shit he is
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
NOT EVEN KIDDING RIGHT NOW. THE GUY IN THE SPIDERMAN COSTUME JUST FELL OFF THE ROOF INTO A BABY POOL. GET HERE NOW!!
The toilet wouldn't flush at the club so I literally just shat in the garbage.
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
FYI telling a guy that you're glad his dick isn't big after giving him a bj, is NOT a compliment.
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