Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
Every night before bed, when I used to say prayers, now I just think to myself 'freshman sluts. Soon'
I tried to go shot for shot with some guy called "shit show martinez"
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
I opened my door to find him standing there with vodka, McDonalds, a smile and a hard-on. Of course I let him in.
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
Randomize
