everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
i can totally see doctors naming an STD after you
after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
Dude...that line about her giving me a blowjob to get rid of her hangover actually got rid of her hangover. Spread the word.
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
I'm tryna think of an appropriate time to say "when I suck other dicks they seem like training dicks compared to yours" but I really can't think of a good way to say that
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
All I wanted was to die alone with my dogs....how did I end up here
I don't know if I should laugh or punch you
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
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