need another drink. this is the easiest way
party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
You told him how lucky he was to be an elephant and kept trying to grab his "trunk"
She woke me up, whispered "I like the size of your dick", kissed me, and rolled over and went back to sleep
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
Dude, those shrooms u gave me made me remember writing the bible. Fuckn awesome
My life is literally the worst. I was just laughing so hard at how hot they looked feeding each other the brownies and then I was like DON'T CRY
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
My girlfriend is so strong now. Like on the one hand its kind of hot because she can pin me down during sex, but on the other hand she picked me up and carried me bridal style at the company bbq.
Dude you were so wasted you thought a fake electric candle was real and tried to light your cig with it. Multiple times.
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
Randomize
