Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
you told all the 17 year old girls at the party that your mating call was "I glitter in the sun"
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
i put that paper plate back in your cabinet because i ate all the ketchup off and you can't even tell. you're welcome.
Johns diaper came in the mail. He's freaking out thinking there's some conspiracy going on since he sharted on the drive home from st. Louis
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
I think we've entered a low point in our relationship when I'm sending you pictures of pubic hair designs "because they're funny"
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
You were so drunk Last night you asked for your glasses so you could read the directions on a band aid
Randomize
