awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
I woke up covered in my own vomit with a pocket full of napkins. I guess I knew I would need them, but was not coherent enough to use them before passing out.
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
You totally drew a penis wizard on my closet that says "I travel for cock rock"
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
no, i remember trying to staple my nipples together. I just can't figure out where the hell stapler came from.
Do you ever feel like your dog agrees with you? Like REALLY really agrees.
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
I think I reached some stage of aging, have a sore/injured shoulder from sex, next up carpal tunnel from sexting.
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
Guess who just bought an ounce of pot via Paypal, and paid for it with my airline Visa card to earn miles?
Congratulations. That business degree is finally worth every penny it cost you.
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
I lost my favorite bra in his hotel room. Is it bad that that's the only reason I hope he texts me tomorrow?
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