First rule of pills: If you can't remember what it is, take half.
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
I just picked up my chili cheese fries off the ground ate them, and then licked up the cheese that was still on the concrete. Thank you Jagerbombs
We're gonna take a moment of silence to pray... that his penis is as pretty and as talented as his brothers.
No one would take shots with Caroline so she asked the bartender for like 20 jagerbombs and then shouted "JAGERBOMBS FOR HOMELESS ANIMALS BENEFIT" and everyone started doing them with her
Why did I wake up to grapes taped my ears ?
Sorry dude, we didn't want you to hear us. Seemed like a good idea at the time.
You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Randomize
