just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
This smoking ban is really fucking with my ability to fart in public
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
I mean how do you tell a nurse in the ER that you dislocated your knee giving a blowjob to your boyfriend.
Very innocently.
There's a black statue of liberty dancing on the side of the road. Please hold while I join him.
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
It was like in the Christmas carol when the guy pulls his robe back and 2 small children appear... except this time it was a massive scrotum
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
Like he held up the condom afterwards, twirled it with his finger, and said "look at that load"
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
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