Let's just say there is a bloody hand print above my bed and it's not mine. Literally.
bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
This inappropriate post strip club text brought to you by Cheetah of Palm Beach and vodka. Blowjob in the champagne room and the clap for the low low price of your paycheck.
also, the amount of semen in my carpet right now is unforgivable...
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
I told her I didn't have a condom. She then sized me with her thumb and finger and tossed me a large. Then I asked her to marry me.
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
If u ever apologize to me for "too-rough" sex again I will suspend ur all-access pass to my vagina indefinitely
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
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