Take a Tylenol with a HUGE glass of water before you pass out, you'll thank me in the morning.
i dony have tylonal but i had a snickers and popcorn and a bottle of water and i am.. brushing my teeth!
Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
You're breaking my vagina 4 times a day I reserve the right to know your middle name.
I'm drunk and you're awesome. let's stay this way forever.
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
my mom snuck into my room, washed her clothes and made her breakfast. what the fuck she's a better boyfriend than I am
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
He told his wife he was too old to pretend to be straight. She tried to argue. He walked two tables over and was like this is my highschool sweetheart and he's an excellent fuck, we're running away together. It was epic.
Randomize
