Saw a dead body on the way to the casino. I think that's a good sign.
Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
I really want to text him and congratulate him on having a bigger penis than the guy I dumped him for, but I thought that might be awkward...
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
Welp just ran into my high school history teacher while buying a pregnancy test...there goes my veil of innocence in this town.
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
I should not have moved in with him. He's got porn stashed everywhere like a homosexual squirrel.
You love porn!
Not in the sugar bowl when I'm making my Mom coffee I don't.
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