You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
My pupils are so HUGE you can see into my soul from 2 miles away
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
College is a time for personal growth. Meaning it's time to start using those pickup lines on randos at dive bars.
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
You know you have crossed to the dark side of marriage when a nap is more important than jacking off
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
Yeah it got awkward when the two guys we were playing beer pong against realized that I'd hooked up with both of them. Their teamwork declined after that.
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
Randomize
