My head feels like little people r playing bumper cars inside it
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
They thought I was the paid stripper pretty much, and a lady tried to set me up with her nephew and then wanted to get my number for lesbian daughter... A typical night for me
After a certain blood-alcohol level, the dog is in charge.
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
Look I'm sorry I stuffed your wife's bouquet toss but I won't have that weak shit in my house.
I also need to get my life together but instead I just eat spoonfuls of Nutella. We can't win 'em all
My walk of shame is starting to become positively reinforcing; I stop by Starbucks and when I leave I look someone just heading to work.
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
Randomize
