Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
You don't get off work for this? I feel genuinely bad for you.
I'll have a beer when I get into the office. Yes, I hide beer in my work frige.
if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
so let's talk penis.
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
My brother just asked if I would keep having one nighters with that guy because he really likes the organic cotton v-necks he leaves behind.
on the subway to an interview & there's a dude doing whippits out of a cheese wil can
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
How did you get him out of the shower last time?
Order Taco Bell and leave a trail of burritos leading to his bed.
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
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