haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
No more parties with babies... I can't do that again.
I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
he's washing the lighter in the sink and telling me to picture unicorns. requesting backup.
My mom and dad are smoking a joint while lecturing me on what to bring and how to act in Europe. I'll finish this glass of wine and head over.
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
Notice how both of our plans for hooking up with these guys involve getting them drunk?
Oh my God, we're like men but with great boobs.
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
Crying while listening to Miley Cyrus. BE GLAD YOU JUMPED THIS SINKING SHIP!
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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