After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
i think i gave myself a perma-hangover. or god just hates me.
Good to know: if a hot girls asks to go back to my place, she probably just needs to vomit all over my bathroom
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
Why are there maracas in the dishwasher?
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
I'm pretty sure I told everyone in the bar I hadn't had sex in five months. And then I offered everyone calamari.
My date just wheeled me home in a shopping cart but it was normal
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
I'm eating chocolate cake while this guy snaps me from the gym. Like I cant believe i actually considered getting rid of this cake. Have fun sweating ima eat this cake 👌
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
Randomize