You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
sitting in my room eating a boneless rib tv dinner, and listening to taylor swift's love story, and i sharted. had to finish the ribs and hear the end of the song before i went to the bathroom to wipe.
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
I can't find the remote or the Doritos. Someone call 911. S.O.S. I sent this in Braille.
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
he had hair everywhere except his balls
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
I was desperate and wasn't about to let my cereal get soggy so I ate it on the toilet. Don't let me repeat last night.
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
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