Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
I almost didn't wake up for my first day of work. The 3rd bottle of champagne was a mistake. And the 2nd bottle of wine after that was probably excessive
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
Attempting to teach the cat how to shake. I need a job.
My roomate asked me why she found condoms in the pringles container. I don't know what to tell her
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
Youll thank me when youre dead an dont have a cat eating your face
Was I asleep on the ride home?
Yea, then when I tried to hold your head up on a turn, you round house punched me in the face.
THE PRUIS IN YOUR DRIVEWAY IS NOT YOURS
excuse me?
I accidentally borrowed your spare keys a while ago...i just tried them...that, my friend, is not your car.
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