Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
I feel like my chances would have been better if I hadn't told her "I need to fuck you before you leave."
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
You talked about giving to sperm banks on a first date. What did you expect?
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
He left a full handprint on my ass. He called it a "five-star review."
Told him I just wanted to be friends. He responded, "The best marriages are born from great friendships." Please come get me.
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Do you recall asking me to zip line through your wedding dressed as a bleeding angel?
Randomize