I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
i think my mom watched the whole time
just woke up to a 10 min voicemail of you singing "99 red ballons".... you need to work on your german..
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
He was carrying a rolled up carpet saying he was saving it for tomorrow's Walk of Fame.
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
My mom wants to name our new dog the same name as my fuck buddy. This will be weird
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
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