I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
She wants to practice her harmonica skills on my penis
So yeah, don't be alarmed when you come home after work to find me eating cookie dough out of a margarita glass with a knife and watching The Little Mermaid. It's been one of those days.
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
Dude I just woke up with a dog sleeping on me.
I thought you didnt have a dog??
Exactly.
Randomize
