idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
I woke up wearing a cow costume. I'm not even gonna try to recall what happened last night.
my shower just felt like jesus cried on me. like he shed tears just for my shower.
You were screaming across the bar "BUYING US SHOTS ISN'T GOING TO MAKE US STRAIGHT, YA KNOW!!!!!!!!"
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
Pizza rolls are incredible. They are like sex, except I have them sometimes
Can you send me a picture of your dog? I might need to borrow him so I can wear a speedo to a pool party on Friday
And why in he fuck did I get 'dick' in Romanian tattooed on my forearm
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
A bitchslap is in order.
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
Every dick I’ve had or wanted in the last year is married. It’s like I became a professional home wrecker after I graduated.
Randomize
