office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
We're not in high school anymore. I'm not going to pretend to be impressed as he butchers my favorite songs on his guitar. I just wanted to get laid.
He answered his phone while he was eating me out and proceeded to yell at his wife for interrupting lunch...impressed or rock bottom?
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
Obama's speech on in 9 mins. Me in the shower now. Naked. Make your choice.
I'm bringing the tv in with me.
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
So apparently after I spilled candle wax down the front of my pants, I went to the store, bought condoms, and passed them out to everyone at the bar.
I thought they were lying to me about the condoms, until I found the receipt in my pocket.
I keep finding Kraft singles in his pockets. Honestly, this is the weirdest family I've ever worked for.
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
What did you delete my number or something
Oh honey. What makes you think I saved in in the first place?
Just because you haven’t had your UTI yet doesn’t mean you have a right to talk like Yoda
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