My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
i have a girlfriend
if you're drunk do you have a girlfriend?
no
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
His glasses broke on the way to the bar aNd he ended up talking to this butterface all night. I didn't have the heart to tell him
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
Hey we met at the bar a week ago. Your friend gave me a rose and you asked about my nipples.
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
How do I send someone an apology text for giving them a lap dance in the middle of a party last night?
Randomize
