if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
I was eating out this girl yesterday and when I finished, she asked me if I wanted to take any home with me. She was serious, dude!
What does that even mean?
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
We're celebrating his weight gain and arrest.and by we I mean I, and by celebrating I mean getting dangerously drunk
running the faucet water is not hiding the sound of you vomiting. fyi.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
You know you're doing well in life when weed is considered to improve your job performance
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
So that prostitue I banged at Steve's bachelor party just texted and invited me to a BBQ at her parents. Never again doubt the power of the cock piercing.
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
Man, it's really obvious that I was either handcuffed or tied up last night. Either way, not something you'd want coworkers knowing.
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
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