did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
OMFG I JUST SAW SOMEONE GIVING SOMEONE ELSE ROAD HEAD AND THEY HIT A POTHOLE. my day has been officially made.
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
I'm going to keep a tally of how many lives I ruin this summer. Starting today.
Already at 3 and it's not even noon.
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
Stop letting me drink alone on saturdays. My last 2 google searches were "short legs" and "caterpillar eyebrows" ? I don't even know.
Randomize
