It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
Before he took off his pants he paused and said, "Remember..sometimes great things come in small packages."
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
No, but its not like diarrhea. i swear its like my intestines had a secret bank account and i just punched in the right pin.
Thanks man, but unless some hot chick comes in to work with a case of beer and offers me a head job, I'm pretty much screwed for New Years
Pictures of drunk me in a bike helmet are like McDonald's collectible toys. There's sooo many, but NO ONE has seen all of them.
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
Saw a girl lying on her back next to a fire hydrant. Not sure if passed out drunk or sleeping under the stars
wait nvm its a dude
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
I don't know how Dave is alive, I feel like he's been drinking since I met him.
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
"I wonder if vinegar is some sort of magical hangover cure" "...no I was definitely still drunk and drinking vinegar because I was thirsty"
He’s going to a lawnmower race. I got a Brazilian and he’s racing a lawnmower race. Pick me up. I’m not wasting this waxing on John Deer
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