Moving to Utah. Got sick of alcohol and have a severe wife shortage.
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
For future reference, a lint roller appears to be the easiest way to get glitter out of a beard.
Is it possible to make a milkshake in a martini shaker or am I gonna need a blender?
He poured syrup on all those broken dishes because "syrup is magical, and by the time we wake up, they'll be fixed."
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
I have fence marks all over my body
I just made some sangria and taking a roadie on my stroller walk around the hood! Parenting at its finest
My husband was abducted by a group of disco dancers in the parde and danced off down the street. If you see him, tell him to Hustle on home and clean the cat box. #MardiGras
we're so committed to being not committed
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
I hooked up with a sophomore, passed out at midnight, and apparently drunkenly peed on Nicole's wedding invitation
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
Randomize
