You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
Don't worry. I just took 2 benadryls and beat off. I'm practically sleep texting
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
so I finished the entire bottle...next thing I know, it's 8 am and I wake up on the fucking beach in the low tide with a family standing about 30 feet from me just staring.
i made sure i dropped the whole "im a yoga teacher" bomb which basically roofies a guys sense of judgement and guarantees he will sleep with me.
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
The chick working the drive through at BK on New Years stuck her head out the window and told me there were no line ups for the bathrooms inside so i should go in there. I just kept squatting and peeing and told her it would prob help business.
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
I just noped my wife on Tinder. Turns out I was the second one to find out that we both have it.
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
I hope Trump leaves Planned Parenthood alone for at least another month. The week got away from me. #whorelando
IM ON THE WEIRD DRUGS AND I JUST SAW THAT TOM HARDY THING NOW I WANT TO HUMP
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
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