Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
I told him I'd go cook him breakfast, but ended up passing out on the kitchen floor in the fetal position spooning the dog
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
I will most likely miss you the least and fondly remember you as Mr. "I need a minute" but really need 24 hours and 4 extra inches.
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
Randomize
