ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
But you have work tomorrow. And a whore to pick up. And a dinner to eat. And a vagina to slaughter. Your day is full!
I appreciate the concept of vaginal slaughtering.
I think I'm still drunk and I think you were in my dream (sadly, it was not a sexual bill murray one).
It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left...
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
It tastes like you we're too lazy to shower and instead just sprayed yourself with Febreeze.
You have a very discerning palate.
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
He gave me the "find somebody who wants to date you for who you are" speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants.
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
Randomize
