I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
so I was like, you know platform 9 3/4? I know something else with those measurements. best. pick up line. ever.
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
i'm gonna friendzone myself so you dont have to
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
Randomize
