dude, I'm watching paul blart mall cop. I have better things to do than listen to you whine about your recent divorce.
She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
Boys can't fool me. I know "want to come up and meet my dogs?" is just a nondirect way of saying "come up and meet my penis".
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
Given he decided my interview was a date, showed up drunk and insisted on carrying me everywhere, we weren't off to a good start.
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
Ps I'm glad our relationship hasn't progressed into having to get married so we legally can't testify against each other
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
this hospital has no fireball
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
Randomize
