uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
the russians are downstairs with the vodka loudly proclaiming happy birthday america. i don't care if it's the fourth, i care that it's 9 am and they woke me up.
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
i woke up to the sound of my roommate climbing onto my desk mumbling that she was going to bed
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
you sternly forced jackson to start preheating the oven around midnight so you could make bagels in the morning
you were serious about those bagels
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
Randomize
