Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
We found you facedown on his couch in a pile of cheerios, with only one shoe on. Dude you said you were staying in last night.
Oh you have the munchies, Dad? That's great and congratulations on the weed but STOP EATING MY APPLE PIE
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
Dude, he danced with the dog that some random chick was carrying at the bar. Then the dog jumped out of his arms and ran away. THAT definitely deserves a drink.
How’s the date going?? Do you think he’s gonna cut your face off and wear it to his birthday party?
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
Heard flapping noises behind me. It was my roommate flapping her bathrobe like wings, saying "I'm a faaaiiiiry."
Randomize
