We should be called the Road Head Warriors
I bet i've been more pregnant than you.
it's like god just wants me to be high for five days in a row. keep the blizzards coming.
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
Swear to god our friendship has its limits. Stop peeing on the fucking refrigerator.
I don't care how fucking drunk you are, you don't forget wanting to shove a wine bottle up someone's ass.
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
Don’t get me wrong—I love silver and bracelets—but handcuffs are not a good look on me…
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