How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
you always know who the new freshman are on fb because theyre always wearing prom dresses
She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
The guy drove to our house at 6am to sell us weed. Now that's customer service.
She tased me when I walked in the door. Thought I was trying to steel her weed.
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
Listen, everyone has a price and mine is free taco bell.
Remembering I sold my brand new Blackberry to a stranger for a few pints = Worst night of my life. Now to work out what I did with my shoes.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
I never truly understood the phrase ball is life until I started having to balance NBA finals and all these men with balls i'd like to handle.
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
Sitting on my couch watching TV in my underwear drinking a bottle of wine.... and you want to interrupt me to come pick you up. No I will not do it.
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