My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
half the nation just spent an hour watching a balloon fly around. we are officially the dumbest fucking country.
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
So "Abstinence August" was a bust. Maybe I'll try for "Sex-free September" or "Only if we're facebook official October"
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
At 27 it's no longer called 'slutty', it's called having a healthy sex life...
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
There was a slutty maid costume on the floor when I woke up, but the house was trashed. Either she's been fired or got promoted, I'm not sure which.
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
Randomize
