You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
i think the bruises are from the grocery store. on separate occasions. i've been spending a lot of time drunk at the market lately.
i have a vague recollection of being in the parking deck around 4 this morning, and on monday morning i was naked on the roof.
that would mean it's on tape
as soon as I walked into work this morning, my boss called me out on my hangover, patted me on the back and said I'm getting time an a half for even showing up. Did I really look that bad this morning?
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
the whole "pretend to be sober/pull it together for my family" thing really blew up in my face when i threw up into my pillowcase.
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
Dude. My tinder just blew up in Seattle. I'm moving here. I don't give a fuck
Why do I like him? He literally has no redeeming qualities.
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
Randomize