These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
He just made my one night stand pancakes for breakfast. And I thought living with my ex was going to be weird.
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
I renamed some of my contacts in my phone before passing out and I have one I cant figure out, its "fucking house elf scum"
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
Nah, we’re just sitting around talking about different kinds of boners
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