Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
Shes sitting on the front porch puking in to the pumpkin she just carved...in the rain. I guess pumpkin spice tequila shots wasnt our best idea.
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
I stirred my drink with a butcher knife. His roomate keeps giving me dirty looks
Like what do you want from me
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
Heeyy... sorry I got so drunk. You probably don't ever want to see me again. Thank you for dealing with me when I tried to jump over the deli counter for some mayonnaise.
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
havent showered in 2 days. just Febrezed my balls in the car before going into a movie alone with a 40 of Guinness.there isn't a word in English for how single I am.
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
Randomize
