I'm tuning in to watch Heidi Montag crash and burn on the Miss Universe Pageant. Somebody call 911. and I'm not talking about the Sean Kingston song.
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
His birthday is on fathers day. I know its a cruel coincedence but this is too funny to pass up.
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
I have a half pound of weed, a case of beer, 8 frozen pizzas and a hard dick. You have a high tech super-bong and a chest of sex toys. That's our vacation week right there.
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.
I'm about to have a bowl of Advils... without any fucking milk.
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
Randomize
