You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
Turns out lunch break sex with someone you cant stand being around for any amount of time just makes you wish you had gone to get tacos like you originally planed.
And now I'm drinking leftover wine in the grad lounge because fuck my life
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
When are your genitals available?
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
I figured it out! There's blood on the kitchen floor because I fell into the dishwasher. And there's a face dent. And it doesn't work.
Yea.....I saw that happen.
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
Randomize
