That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
I woke up on the toilet with my feet gorilla glued to the floor, cake and makeup on my face and my hand glued to my head.
Welcome to the world of vodka. Rule #1: NEVER PASS OUT. Happy 21st
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
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