whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
MOMMMMMMMMMMAYYY! YOU BIRFED ME TODAYY. IM CELEBRTIN ON YUR BEHAF! THANK YOU!!!!!
I always hoped you would never inherit this side of my personality. Hon, trust me, you're a mess. Go to bed...alone. xoxoxo
The fire alarm went off at 3 am in the freshmen dorm. So guess which junior everyone now knows is hooking up with a freshman? This girl...
I just set a reminder on my phone to get star spangled hammered this weekend.
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
someone stole all your weed so you told us you were planning each of our deaths
my god I love twenty year old dicks
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
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