for our anniversary he stepped it up a notch and bought cool whip rather than the store brand. i was impressed.
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
i had a dream last night that my liver tore its self out of my body and ran away.
If there's ever a time when I've matured to the point that I don't want to look at camera-phone-titties, go ahead and bury me in a shallow grave by the railroad tracks.
There was a photo of his face glued to a lifesize Kim Kardashian cutout. By the end of the night he was doing shots out of medicine cups and making everybody hug it goodbye.
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
I am in a hotel room with 10 people. John is in bed eating an industrial sized pan of mashed potatoes. I think a non insignificant number of people saw my nipples.
She asked if she should pack the condoms, I told her I plan on drinking so much that it won't be possible.
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
You grabbed my arm, said "I need you" in a very concerned voice and dragged me to the other room where you were blasting Evolution of Beyoncé.
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
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